Since I'm a political junkie, I spend more time thinking about Dick Durbin and his pals than Brad Pitt. I have this fantasy that in the face of surmountable odds, a lone Democratic senator stands up to fillibuster Alito. In my imagination it's Durbin who does the right thing but I don't care who it is. Start the Barry White CD ...
At the start of the thing the corporate media goes nuts in a concerted effort to mock and discredit the Senator. Is Senator X shutting down the Senate? How is Mrs. Alito reacting? What does this kind of bitter partisan grandstanding mean for America? Is Alito being targetted by the Democrats because of his Italian heritage? Do you think Senators should be allowed to filibuster? Should Howard Dean apologize to all Italian-Americans? Call in now. Judge Alito, universally reported as "dignified and determined" in his response to the stunt, is confident that the filibuster will not hurt his chances.
It's a full-court press of inanity and shrieking condemnation but the Senator survives the first several hours of the filibuster. The Dems maintain a unified front, supporting the option of their colleague to do what s/he thinks is right. Mary Landrieu keeps her mouth shut. Sen. Byrd remembers that he's got a pair and risks his reelection to loudly support the effort. The senator tires. The RWNM and its corporate media auxilliary howl about the loss of business in the Senate and tie the fillibuster to Iran's nuclear capability. Polls appear: Do fillibusters weaken our defenses against terrorism? Should the senator be tried for treason or simply expelled from the chamber by force? The senator rallies.
Polls start to come back. Public opinion is mixed but support for the senator edges out disapproval 22% to 19% with 59% of those polled unsure what a filibuster is and who's this Alito guy anyway? The Democrats, sensing the emerging tide, begin to support the senator, although cautiously. Joe Biden guests on Meet the Press to say that although the Nuclear Option isn't something he would do, he undertands that it's a legitimate tool the Republicans feel like they need to use. This is the first mention from either side of the Nuclear Option. The RWNM continues to howl. Adam Nagourney gets front page space with an article entitled, "Election Year Filibuster Risky for Democrats." The anonymously sourced pull quote reads: "If this maneuver fails, the Democrats won't be able to recover in time for the mid-terms."
The Senator tires. Students at Princeton University set up a sympathy filibuster. Concerned Alumni of Princeton move immediately to shut it down on the grounds that it disturbs the peaceful atmosphere of the campus and doesn't accurately reflect student opinion. More polls come back. Although it is still unclear whether a majority of Americans know who Alito is, the nuclear option pulls in only single-digit support against huge unfavorables. RWNM complains that the term "nuclear option" is biased and calls for new polls calling it the Constitutional Option. Filibuster's favorables outpace unfavorables by a 9-point margin and top BushCo's approval ratings. Emboldened by this stoke of luck and armed with a talking point they can remember, more Dems show support for the Senator but still can't get booked on cable television. Katie Couric asks the head of the Italian American Anti-Defamation League to explain the roots of the Democratic party's animus toward Italian-Americans. Does it have anything to do with the Kennedys? Mrs. Alito weeps.
Senator Lindsay Graham writes and publishes a book about the decline of civilty in the Congress. "This is without a doubt the greatest threat facing America today," he tells Larry King, Tucker Carlson, Chris Matthews, Tim Russert, Bob Schieffer, Maura Liasson, Elizabeth Vargas, Star Jones, Shep Smith, Anderson Cooper, Richard Stevenson, Dana Milbank, David Brooks, Rush Limbaugh and Wall Street Journal readers via a two-part op-ed.
Thanks to a six-hour question from the senator from Massachusettes, the Senator rallies. Sympathy filibusters are showing up on campuses across the country. Shut Up and Vote rallies, sponsored by Clear Channel are increasingly popular as well. More polls come back. The Constitutional Option polls well but support for the filibuster is still growing. The South Carolina numbers are especially good leading the straight-talking John McCain to emerge from his 2008 campaign bus holding hands with Joe Lieberman to endorse the filibuster because "it is time for the nation to heal and move forward."
Alito withdraws his nomination for the good of the country. The corporate media immediately announces the victory for the Repubican party and President Bush, who kept the country together during this time of crisis. Fevered speculation begins as to whether the Democrats can ever be credible on any issue involving national security again.
I can't wait for the movie!
Posted by: PSoTD | January 27, 2006 at 09:06 AM
Nice one.
Cross-posted?
Posted by: DavidByron | January 27, 2006 at 09:29 AM
I didn't but what the hell? I will.
Posted by: eRobin | January 27, 2006 at 09:41 AM